My mom and I used to joke all the time about each of us at times being a "meanie mcfeenie". Basically, being insensitive, nonsupportive or down right sarcastic. I do have a little streak, I must admit and I know it comes from my lack of patience (which I pray everyday, that the trait develops). I do think I get that from my mother, but I have certainly taken it to the next level. Whoops....
While both my mother and I can be short-fused, we are truly sweet, caring individuals and 9 out of 10 times recognize our overly mean 'tudes and adjust them. Thank goodness for that.
What is interesting is that in the February issue of HR Magazine there is an article titled "Don't be so rude: Quell workplace incivility". Incivility, hmmm, is what I initially thought. So, this is the fancy word for being "mean as hell". I like it.
For some reason, my work ethic does not allow my mean spirit to appear at work. Maybe because my sense of professionalism outweighs my desire and ability to be an "a-hole" between 8 and 5. I do believe there is a time and place for everything, and more so, I care about my professional reputation. In my last job and in my current I've encountered very mean-spirited people. It boggles my mind that people are so rude, and nasty at work. You clearly don't have to and most likely will not like all the people you work with - that's life. However, being cordial and tolerating others is more appropriate workplace behavior.
I've finally moved past the very mean people or those with negative dispositions at my job who stand right next to me in the elevator and wont respond to my hello, or someone not saying excuse me in the break room. I personally have tackled that by avoidance. If I see someone who is routinely mean to me waiting for the elevator, I choose to take the stairs and burn a couple calories instead, or if I choose to ride the elevator I pretend to talk on my cell phone or text. While, my own civility may come into question sometimes when I will push the close button on the elevator doors to prevent the mean person from entering the elevator with me - I'd rather call it meanness averted. Why subject myself to these people, if I don't have to, right?
The HR Magazine article said to prevent this type of toxic environment from forming or going to far, companies need to be clear and communicate the culture of the organization and what type of behavior is acceptable and what won't be tolerated. We all know the saying, "misery loves company" or "monkey see monkey do" for that matter. Rudeness can be contagious. Just think...one mean girl or guy can start to rub off on the nice people, then you have a company full of mean people and even when you hire nice people they will either quit or turn mean - leaving the company a big pathetic mess.
So here's my two cents:
If you are a leader of an organization, be sure to include in your employee handbook or in your mission statement that "respecting others" also includes being courteous and putting forth your best efforts to present a positive disposition.
If you aren't in a leadership role, remember that you still have the opportunity to influence others, by not falling into the negativity when it comes your way and showing others that while everyday won't be perfect being mean or discourteous won't solve whatever is bringing them down. My hopes is that the positivity will rub off on them. If it doesn't, you can always try - avoidance!