Meanie McFeenie

My mom and I used to joke all the time about each of us at times being a "meanie mcfeenie". Basically, being insensitive, nonsupportive or down right sarcastic. I do have a little streak, I must admit and I know it comes from my lack of patience (which I pray everyday, that the trait develops). I do think I get that from my mother, but I have certainly taken it to the next level.  Whoops....
While both my mother and I can be short-fused, we are truly sweet, caring individuals and 9 out of 10 times recognize our overly mean 'tudes and adjust them. Thank goodness for that.
What is interesting is that in the February issue of HR Magazine there is an article titled "Don't be so rude: Quell workplace incivility". Incivility, hmmm, is what I initially thought. So, this is the fancy word for being "mean as hell". I like it.

For some reason, my work ethic does not allow my mean spirit to appear at work. Maybe because my sense of professionalism outweighs my desire and ability to be an "a-hole" between 8 and 5. I do believe there is a time and place for everything, and more so, I care about my professional reputation. In my last job and in my current I've encountered very mean-spirited people. It boggles my mind that people are so rude, and nasty at work. You clearly don't have to and most likely will not like all the people you work with - that's life. However, being cordial and tolerating others is more appropriate workplace behavior.

I've finally moved past the very mean people or those with negative dispositions at my job who stand right next to me in the elevator and wont respond to my hello, or someone not saying excuse me in the break room. I personally have tackled that by avoidance. If I see someone who is routinely mean to me waiting for the elevator, I choose to take the stairs and burn a couple calories instead, or if I choose to ride the elevator I pretend to talk on my cell phone or text. While, my own civility may come into question sometimes when I will push the close button on the elevator doors to prevent the mean person from entering the elevator with me - I'd rather call it meanness averted. Why subject myself to these people, if I don't have to, right?

The HR Magazine article said to prevent this type of toxic environment from forming or going to far, companies need to be clear and communicate the culture of the organization and what type of behavior is acceptable and what won't be tolerated.  We all know the saying, "misery loves company" or "monkey see monkey do" for that matter. Rudeness can be contagious. Just think...one mean girl or guy can start to rub off on the nice people, then you have a company full of mean people and even when you hire nice people they will either quit or turn mean - leaving the company a big pathetic mess.

So here's my two cents:

If you are a leader of an organization, be sure to include in your employee handbook or in your mission statement that "respecting others" also includes being courteous and putting forth your best efforts to present a positive disposition.

If you aren't in a leadership role, remember that you still have the opportunity to influence others, by not falling into the negativity when it comes your way and showing others that while everyday won't be perfect being mean or discourteous won't solve whatever is bringing them down.  My hopes is that the positivity will rub off on them.  If it doesn't, you can always try - avoidance!

Tick Tock goes the clock

Time is of the essence.  Time is money.  Time is precious.  These are things I thought about when sitting in a meeting this afternoon that should have taken one hour but instead took close to two and a half hours.  Initially transitioning from the classroom to the workplace proved very difficult for me as I learned that there is the potential for lots of meetings in the course of one day: planned meetings, impromptu meetings, meetings that run over the end time, meetings that did not have a purpose and so on.

 However, in the last 6 years of my corporate work experience I have not only been broken into attending, facilitating and planning meetings, I have also grown to enjoy them, when they are a means to inform, summarize, clarify, and/or reiterate information, brainstorm and collect ideas, or  implement, in other words  productive.  Oh, and facilitated in a timely manner.

After the two and half hour meeting, I thought that although the objective was met and I was enlightened on the performance management system that I had not yet been trained on, I realized that there were numerous missteps by the meeting facilitator that led to our meeting being extremely long for no reason.  So, I present to you the five missteps that took place in the meeting I attended today and how to avoid them.  Read these carefully so when you facilitate a meeting you won't make the same mistakes and waste your employees or colleagues valuable time.

1. Test technical props (Lap tops, wireless connections, projector screens, phone lines, etc)
    being used for the meeting prior to the start time.  Things can and will go wrong, and most times it will be out of your control, however testing early allows more time to move on to a "Plan B" if you encounter issues.  Trying to troubleshoot in front of your meeting attendees is unprofessional and gives them the impression who were not prepared and makes them feel as if  you are wasting their time, which technically you will be if the meeting runs over. 
2. Do not digress.  While the topic may remind you of a funny joke, a recent scenario or previous experience, refrain from excessive side bar conversations, off topic comments and any other dialogue that will not add value and also prolong the meeting.  Save your irrelevant chatter until the meeting concludes.
3. Provide materials in advance if possible.  This may not always be possible or even necessary so use your best judgement here.  If you are training the meeting attendees on new material, handouts and/or instructions would be fitting.  This will save time down the line after the meeting, in that the attendees will have the information at their fingertips and not have to return to you for further explanation or search around for how-to's.
4. If the meeting time is up - set up a time to continue the meeting at a later date. Most people plan to be available for the meeting time communicated to them and that meeting time only.
5. BONUS - You are probably thinking, what if I am attending a meeting that is wasting my time?  Take control politely.  This will not work in all cases, but it is possibly to move the meeting along, by interjecting and getting the group back on task.  Suggest a timekeeper if you see time is getting to be a problem and also bring the group back to the meeting topic if they get off track by using a line like this "Julie, I understand your explanation of step 1 of the process, what would step 2 entail?"  This shows you are interested in the subject matter, but also want to cut out the unnecessary chit chat.

Here's to productive meetings in and out of the office! 

Your mother doesn't work here - clean up after yourself!

When I first started working at my current job 4 years ago, I was amazed to find real dishes in the breakrooms.  No really; drinking glasses, coffee mugs, plates, bowls, silverware and get this - a dishwasher!  I was quite puzzled, as my previous places of employment only had sinks, refrigerators and microwaves.  So this was totally new to me. 

Once explained to me, the efforts to cut down on waste and to go green, I warmed up to fact that these breakrooms were full fledge kitchens, just like at home!  But as my tenure progressed, I began to observe that the employees were treating these "at work" kitchens like they were "at home" kitchens.  Right now, at my house, my dishes are piled up in the sink (working girl = full sink until the weekend), but would I necessarily feel compelled to just dump my dirty dishes in the sink and leave for who knows who to clean up, at work?  Yeah, not so much. 

Why do people think this is ok?  Now of course this is not everyone, you have people like me and then the people who create signs and tape them to the cupboard doors or even on the countertops printed in all caps "CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF!"  Maybe we should remove the dishes?  I don't know what the solution is, we are all adults, and sadly enough people bring their bad home habits to work.  This is interesting to me, most times I would hate for someone to come to my house and see my dirty dishes piled up high or witness any other outside of work or behind closed door behaviors.  I suppose the employees who do this have no shame in their game and like to keep it real no matter where they are????  Beats me.

There is a time and place for everything, so let's try to suppress our behaviors that are not appropriate for work (like being slobs) until we get home OR eat at restaurants where there are servers OR use disposible utensils!